by Steve Stoner

We are born lovers.  We love cheeseburgers, ice cream, pizza, dogs, cats, hunting, fishing, golfing, skiing, shopping, movies, concerts and so on.  We love holidays, we love weekends, we love vacations.  With the very same word, we describe how we feel about the people closest to us in our lives – spouses, parents, children, grandchildren and friends.   It sort of makes one wonder what love is when we use it to describe how we feel about inanimate objects, hobbies, pets, leisure time and people, doesn’t it? Then, to distort the picture even further, you throw in the cultural view of love that is communicated through movies, TV shows and popular music. So, let us consider the answer to the question: What is love?

In most cases when we say we love something, it is because of how it makes us feel.  Cheeseburgers, pizza and ice cream serve to satisfy cravings we have for things that simply taste good to us while satisfying our hunger.

We love our pets for a variety of reasons that include companionship, their unwavering devotion to us, their dependence upon us or simply because the wag of a tail, a lick on the cheek or a purr makes us feel accepted, approved and appreciated.

We love things like hunting, fishing, golfing and shopping because they challenge us in a way few things do.

We love entertainment because it touches a part of our soul.

We love leisure time because it allows us freedom that often eludes us in our busy day-to-day activities.

But is love more than how something makes us feel?  Is love strictly an emotion that comes and goes based on circumstances?  Do we love golf less when we play poorly?  Do we love hunting and fishing less when we don’t bag the “trophy”?  Do we love our children less when they misbehave?  Do we love our spouses less when they don’t respond to us the way we think they should?  Is it true that you can lose that loving feeling as the old Righteous Brothers song suggests?

The fact is, love is a verb, an action word.  It is true that you can feel love for something but true love, the kind of love that we most need and that others need from us, requires action.  If I tell my wife that I love her but neglect her by not listening or by not spending time with her then my actions don’t match my words.  I’m not walking my talk.  If I tell my kids that I love them but am always too busy for them, then do they feel loved?  No amount of gifts or material things will take the place of me and my time to express love.

True love is about giving and sacrificing without expectation or condition.  It is not about us but about what we are giving of ourselves to another.  So, while we love many things that bring us pleasure or comfort, ultimately love is what we give, not what we get.

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.  John 3:16

This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 14th, 2010 at 10:05 pm and is filed under Here's a Thought. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.